shampoo for my real friends
real poo for my sham friends
"Hey remember that time you…"
Yes. I remember every embarrassing thing I have ever done and chances are it keeps me up at night
checking your phone in the middle of the night
Animals that look like toasted marshmallows are just the greatest.
Buns can be toasted marshmallows
And so can cats.
Dogs can also be toasty marshmallows..
Oh my god. THE FLOOF.
Toasted marshmallows everyone.
[walks into pet store puppy area wearing a huge coat]
[shuffles quickly out of pet store in a much tighter fitting coat]
all you girls out there had that stage where you played online dress up games dont even lie
what do you mean had
what do you mean girls
One time when my music theory professor was a student in college, he had to accompany an extremely rude soprano for a recital. She treated him like dirt during rehearsals. Just before going on to perform, she made some really snide remark to him that ticked him off, so he transposed the piece up a half step. She cracked three times.
Always be nice to your accompanists, folks.
There is a special place in hell for people that are rude to their accompanists
"Man humans are lame why don’t we have like wings/horns/etc"
Humans can’t even handle having different skin colors how well do you really think that would go
#basically the plot of x-men
#literally the plot of x-men